How to detox the toxic relationship?

How to detox the toxic relationship?  First, an honest, gut check assessment of the relationship would need to take place.  Everyone is in a relationship because we are getting something out of it.  It’s when the balance of needs is tilted, or even lopsided is when an evaluation is required.

I readily advise people, clients, students, and even friends to discuss these situations with the person.  One needs to be honest and sincere, and deserves to be heard.  If the relationship does not change or grow from these talks, then one needs to see if it’s a healthy situation to be in, or if it needs to cease.

A majority of these situations do involve boundaries.  Instilling healthy personal boundaries is a key element in many of the above dynamics.  I promote people gaining self-insight and inner strength while establishing boundaries.  It gets more difficult when you start building boundaries and are challenged by others.  These come in the forms of “You’re selfish!”  “You’re such a jerk (or insert colorful lingo here).”   Many people are used to you being a doormat, or perhaps always giving in and always being there.  When you start growing and evolving into a healthier you, these people will try to bring you back.  Hold true to yourself and if these individuals do not respect your changing and growing, then perhaps they need to move on.   It’s never easy!  The guilt and shame associated with this growing process can haunt you.  Keep reassuring yourself that this is healthy and you deserve to be heard, to feel important and even loved.     ​

---